Nowadays, many women raise children alone. Scrambling between work and home, they hardly find time for love. And it is quite understandable why this happens. But what can be done with this? How to find a balance between the role of mother and… a woman who is looking for male love? Today we are going to talk about the basic rules of dating as a single European women .
Is it worth it to start a relationship as a single mom
Some single mothers are unfortunate in relationships with men and thus, tell other women why dating is not practical as a single mom. But in fact, it is not so. Every mother wants her baby to be happy. It is no secret that children are more likely to develop harmoniously if they grow up in a full-fledged family. If you are a single mother, then you need a man to feel like a real woman, beloved and desired, and to share with him all the life concerns and joys. Moreover, your child needs a man to see an example of proper male behavior, a model of marriage life and the romantic relationship between a man and a woman.
Many single mothers are afraid of two things – that a man will not be able to love their child and become a good father for the baby, or that no one will ever love them again, because once it didn’t work out. But you should get rid of these fears if you want to engage in romantic relationships and make your child’s life happy, joyful, and full-fledged!
How to start dating as a single mom
After a divorce, a single mother stands hostage for motherhood, which interferes with her personal life in one way or another. Intimate relationships recede into the background and get lost among the worries associated with children, career, relationships with an ex-husband, and household duties of a single mom. For such a woman, it is very difficult to find time, strength, and desire for building a new romantic relationship. But there are 5 useful tips on how to get back into dating as a single mom.
- Be open to new things and try to look at the good side of life
One of the main ways to develop yourself is to search for something new all the time. Do not close yourself to the outside world, be open to the search for interesting activities! It will help you to be in a positive mood, as well as get acquainted with a great number of new people, including handsome men. So, go in for sports, sign up for cooking classes, and make time for walks and meetings with friends. All this makes your life brighter and opens up new opportunities for romantic acquaintances with the opposite sex. In addition, you can engage in communication with people on social networking websites or dating sites to find a suitable man faster. In the end, it may be difficult to start dating as a single mom without dating apps.
Moreover, positive thinking is important in dealing with your son or daughter. Share this wonderful world with your child! If children are already old enough, they may want to go to the gym or visit the theater or various cultural events together with you. It not only develops the personality of your child but also has beneficial effects on the social engagement and building of relationships with other people.
- Do not wait too long to start dating again
Of course, there is no exact answer to the question of when to start dating as a single mom. Each woman needs a certain period of time to restore strength after an unsuccessful relationship and regain the desire to date a man. For some women, it can take months, for others – years. But why do psychologists advise single mothers not to wait too long to start getting a dating experience as a single mom? What negative consequences can this have?
Although you want to rehabilitate yourself after a divorce, often, waiting for the right moment for a new relationship, a woman simply gets used to being alone. As a result, instead of recovery, a single mom receives a whole range of fears and complexes that prevent her from being open to new relationships with the opposite sex. Therefore, do not drag feet. Start fighting complexes right now. This is one of the best ways on how to mentally prepare for dating as a single mom.
- Seek a husband, not a lover
Good sex does not mean a good family. Of course, sexual relationships are important, but it is not the main thing in building a family. It happens that a woman feels so good with a man in bed that she ceases to pay attention to his personal qualities, decides that he is her destiny, and marries him. But when the ardor cools down, the couple runs into conflicts, because partners match each other only in the physical realm.
Therefore, seek a husband, not a lover! If you know yourself and understand that good sex can bind you to a guy, then, first of all, try to evaluate the human qualities of a man, and then, decide on physical intimacy. After all, if you always have conflicts in your family, even good sex will end quickly.
- Be honest with men
First of all, you should look for a husband for yourself. But also, try to evaluate men’s paternal qualities and their love for children. Therefore, do not hide the presence of a child when communicating with men! Talk with a man about your child for at least two reasons. Firstly, if everything that concerns children is unpleasant to a guy, it is better not to introduce such a person into your family. Secondly, if a man treats children with affection, but you hide the child from him being afraid to scare the man, then the guy might think that you aren’t well-trusted or that you are a bad mother because you don’t talk about your baby. There is nothing better than the truth.
Moreover, you should tell the truth not only about the presence of a child. Be honest about your desires, hobbies, and habits. Be yourself! After all, there is nothing worse than a woman who impersonates someone else. As they say “whatever is done in the dark eventually comes to the light”. So, sooner or later, the truth will be revealed, a man will understand that you are not the woman he has fallen in love with and thus, he will leave you.
- Get ready for new acquaintances mentally and physically
First of all, take an unbiased look at your appearance. Being depressed after a break-up of relationships with a child’s father, many girls cease to look after themselves and control nutrition, as a result, they gain extra pounds and look worse. Also, it may happen quite the opposite. After a break-up, women sometimes change for the better to anger men who abandoned them. In terms of morale, the second approach is better for building new relationships. After all, beautiful appearance is a great way to increase self-confidence and attract the opposite sex. Therefore, take care of your appearance before you start dating as a single mother.
Moreover, develop your interests. Even if you are a single mother with two children, this is not a reason to limit your circle of interests exclusively to the needs of children. You have your own life and hobbies that you should not give up. Men love bright and interesting women who can bring new colors to their lives.
What to do with a child on dates?
This is one of the most difficult questions that bother single mothers when they are going out on a date with a man. To say more, it is one of the problems of dating as a single mom. A lot of men complain that they start dating a single mom and not seeing each other as much because of her busyness with a child. So, what to do with a child on a date if you have no one to sit with him?
There are many options for a date with a child, you just need to use your imagination and choose what you like. For example, you and a man can first walk with a child in some interesting place (an amusement park, a playland, a sea promenade, etc.), and then dine in a cozy children-friendly restaurant or cafe. Also, you can hold a picnic in the forest and spend time interestingly with profit to your health. Another good option is a romantic evening date at home. At first, you can play some fun games together, and after that, get a child to bed and spend time alone with a man. All these options bring people together and make relationships much stronger.
Tips how to date as a single mom
Well, now you make no bones about the readiness for a romantic relationship. But what are the rules of dating as a single mother? What should you do to find a good husband or yourself and a caring father for your child? There are 5 helpful tips on how to date as a single mom.
- Allow yourself to be weak on dates with men
Single mothers are strong women who are used to taking care of themselves and their children without exterior help. As a rule, starting a relationship with men as a single mother, such a strong woman begins to habitually compete with a man and prove that she knows and can do everything better. Thus, a woman comes into conflict and frightens a guy away. Although for a man, it is important to feel the very first and strongest in a relationship with a woman. Therefore, do not afraid to be weak and thank a man for being so strong and brave.
- Talk with a child about your relationships
Of course, it is not necessary to tell a child about everything that happens to you outside the home. This will only harm the kid’s worldview. However, if your relationship with a man is serious, you should not withhold this from the child who will anyway meet the man sooner or later. Tell your baby about the positive qualities of the new partner and explain your opinion on the romantic relationship. Listen to the child’s point of view and discuss the anxieties that may appear.
- Do not claim love for your child
Do not demand a man’s love for your child. A guy should be able to take care of the family and help his beloved woman to be a mother – this is the main thing. After all, it happens that a birth father does not hug and kiss his children. Therefore, do not force a stranger man to do this. Moreover, do not force your child to call your man a dad. If your baby has a desire to call your loved one the dad, the child will ask about it.
- Learn about a man’s family
If you want to start a family with a man, get to know his parents, ask about his childhood, and find out how relationships are built between his relatives. After all, many people repeat the behavior patterns of their family – the relationships that a child observes in childhood are perceived as the norm. Also, pay attention to the man’s relationship with his mother. If he speaks badly about his mom, forgets about her, and often says rude things, this is a bad sign. It means that the man will behave with you in a similar vein.
- Draw attention to how a man communicates with strangers
Do not assess a man by the way he treats you and your child at a given time. Perhaps the guy is so cute and buys cars or Barbie only at the beginning of a relationship. It is better to draw attention to how the man communicates with strangers who are not important for him – with sellers in stores, supervisors in public transport, with waiters in restaurants, etc. If the man is rude to other people, that means, over time, he will begin to be rude to you.
Final Thoughts
Every single mother builds a new life in her own way, walking a delicate line between her parental responsibilities and the hope that she, as a woman, will be happy in romantic relationships. The main thing is not to perceive a child either as an obstacle to a new joyful life or as a protection from loneliness. All that you should do is to be open to the world around, develop yourself, take care of your appearance, be honest with men, and be yourself at all. We wish you great happiness!